by | Oct 15, 2009 | Uncategorized
Overhead at SGForums.com, my niggling question of how can a P5 student even attempt suicide? Whether this story is true or not, it’s chilling to the bone.
How can right? How can? Really, how can?
Like, how does an 11year old even thinks about suicide at such a young tender age? TS (thread starter) hasn’t post any source yet, apart from saying that it’s from a Facebook account of a teacher who expresses her/his dismay at his/her student’s demise, but just the thought of it makes me sick.
So much life to live and so much joy to experience yet the student i’s depressed enough to end a life.
Could it be stress? Could it be abuse? Actually it could be many things, but for sure there’s one thing that is lacking that’s a catalyst to the situation, that is family support.
A family is a pillar of strength, a foundation of one’s life, especially a young thing’s fragile life. Why would anyone miss out on life, miss out on the love that a family is able to provide, unless it isn’t there in the first place.
And if a family isn’t there, friends are the next best thing. Make loads of friends and make not enemies. Sure there’ll be those that are bound to dislike you, or hate you even, but by surrounding yourself with the positives (friends, family) you naturally create a pillow to fall back on and naturally your mindset will not be plagued into a paranoia of hatred or revenge or whatever sinister things there is, that could possibly amount to suicide.
I grief for the student’s condition, if really such an event took place.
Hais — one less joy to share with in this world.
![It Rained On The Way To Work On Saturday, But All Is Good!]()
by | Oct 13, 2009 | Uncategorized
This is probably the longest thread title that I’ve ever given to a blog post, because I couldn’t think of a way to summarise it.
I used to be good at summarising, my former Engglish Teacher would attest to that when I tried to pass off 68words as 70 words. It didn’t work of course and the teacher made me resummarise, but that’s an entirely different story. Btw, my version of good at summarising means to kick out stuffs which I deemed irrelevant to a gist. Sometimes I don’t even have enough words to end with.
Today however is one of those days where I can’t crack my brain enough to summarise. I’m thick skulled huh?
Anyway, so what if it rained? It rains every other day, but what made it special when it rained last Saturday while I was on the way to work is that I wore my ‘Baju Melayu’ to ride. So that I didn’t have to go back home after work and instead join my frens immediately with the outing.
But hey, gotta be optimistic and live life rite? This picture sums it all, taken by my colleague after I settled down in the office:
Why so grey Mar? Are you at your work place? Is that a brand new Baju Raya? But you’re not wet? Didn’t you say it rained?
Okay, okay, but what’s wrong with the colour grey? I love it. Anyway, it’s not really that grey but more towards silvery grey. That Songkok I’m wearing on my head, well I got it last minute at 4am, when I went down with family at Geylang for last minute bargains, which turned out to be a mass royal rumble instead.
It’s like there are Aunties and Uncles, Mats and Minahs, Kids and more kids everywhere, all jostling and cramming to inch forward and deny any oncoming traffic any space. If there was a ring and a mat, I’d smackdown some of these people la (not that I can anyways~). So some vendors look as if they’ve decided to no longer commit to this royal rumble anymore with their weary expressions, while some were simply out of words and still holding onto their loud-hailers, and that was where I decided to capitalise on, by targeting the weary vendors who lacked the energy to upsell their stuffs and instead give in to my cheapness. Gee, I’m cheap. *wink*
Still this Baju Raya isn’t brand new, it’s just that it’s been years since I wore it. I think I bought it in 2003 or was it 2004? Can’t remember but I’ve kept it so long in the closet that when I took it out that Saturday, it didn’t need any ironing, as everything was crisp and straight! I think I should just keep my Baju Rayas in this manner from now on.
So thanks to my full set raincoat, I plundered through the rain, settled down in the office, took some pictures and prepared myself for the outing. I thought that everything would go on smoothly and join the D’junkies after work. And then I realised that I left my handphone at home.
Yep, that’s how I felt too.
(This pic taken at the end of the outing, after Irfan couldn’t bear to part ways. He wore the mask to hide away the tears, I presume.)
by | Oct 11, 2009 | Uncategorized
Where else will an absurd idea of getting your thighs cut when ordering tea crop up, if not when I’m around the D’junkies Steamers? Wait, D’junkies Steamers who?
Back in my NYP days, there’s this group of us who used to stay back after class or come early before class and we’ll just simply chit chat or discuss about ongoing projects. These days, even after our graduation and separate lives, we do gather once in a while for a project or two. Here’s one of the pictures we took after a particular project:
Aaaaaaaah! Project name: Raya outing 2009! Wait a minute, who’s that pulling the long face? Didn’t get any green packets eh? Haha.
Ahhhhhh! Here’s a better group picture, taken at Firman’s abode at Tampines. We actually received a treat from his younger brother, who showed us a few magic tricks, which stupedfied most of us, but not Mar and Bangau. His magic tricks were good, and effective but it’s something that I’ve seen countless times, no thanks to Farid who shows me how it’s all being done, but they were good entertainment nevertheless. At least this was something different than the usual Hari Raya house visits.
And this time they managed to give my house a visit, with my sis playing waitress.
And she played cameragirl too with this shot, one of many where as usual we acted candid, but Bangau chose to play serious and pose serious instead. ‘Tangkap Hensem’ in front of my sis. Hehehe.
Hari Raya 2009 with D’Junkies, as always, loads of fun and joy. Cheers~!
Oh, and of course, no good day is complete without a visit to the cybercafe~ So much for the ‘curfew’~
by | Oct 10, 2009 | Uncategorized
I admit, I’ve been a failure almost every day when I fail to keep up to my goal settings, yes I do set goal settings, but for me it’s more of a sketch-up of an impromptu to do lists. Wait a minute, maybe you’re asking why does one sets goals every day? Isn’t that particular thing called a to-do lists? I know I know I know that I probably shouldn’t mix to-do lists and goal settings, cos they span over an entirely different time frame, but like I said, it’s an impromptu to-do lists that I prefer to refer as goal settings.
Arrrghhh! I think the teacher-ish-cum-speak-good-ish nature in me just refused to accept my arguement over calling goal settings as a to-do lists equivalent!
Ok, ok, ok, ok let’s call it a to-do lists then, if only to satisfy my sudden conscience that I’m promoting the wrong message of goal settings. Anyway for the records, one of my goals is to create more jobs. Sounds simple yet scarily… big doesn’t it? Enough about goals for now then..
So back to my failure in completing my to-do lists, or TDL for short. What? So now I’m allowaing myself to coin the term tdl to ease my burden of typing extra characters eh? Pfft..
Um, do you have your own TDLs? If yes, good, I pat you on your back. If no, why not? TDLs help to prioritise your priorities! Easier said than done right? I know, I know, I know ‘cos I’m a victim of procrastination too. It’s been a virus that’s plagued me ever since I joined Nanyang Poly, and no, studying in NYP does not in any way causes a person to procrastinate often. It’s just me, and for the records, NYP is a great school to study at!
That’s why I took 4 years instead of the slated 3 years to complete my diploma. I just had to extend my stay there, right Bangau? Yes Bangau knows the inside story, but only because he spent an extra year with me as well! Good times indeed.
BUT the moral of the story here is that procrastination is bad! Real bad! My point in coming up with this post is perhaps I will be reminded in keeping true to my TDLs and perhaps allot a few hours daily to complete some, if not all.
I’ve done lots of thinking lately, which probably isn’t that much ‘cos I’m not much of a thinker really, but it still qualifies as thinking because it made me focus long and hard on my tasks at hand and what my future could possibly evolve into. I thought that, since I’m often procrastinating my TDLs because of certain events, perhaps I could work out something and compromise some things?
I know that I’m good at coming up with a solution, especially something that amounts to compromising, cos I compromise a lot. Sometimes you win when you compromise. It may be a temporary solution, but it’s a current solution nevertheless.
I think that this time around, instead of throwing my time away till the wee hours every day, I would set aside a certain ‘curfew’ myself so that I am forced to work at my TDLs. Perhaps I would cut myself off from.. this particular foe of mine.. at a certain time in the night so that my TDLs come to the fore.
Yes. I. Can. Do. It.
This is going to be an attempt at keeping true to one’s TDLs and setting the sight set on my goals. At 11pm daily, I will stop you, foe. Then it’s hello TDLs.
Ahhh, sounds so convincing right? But I’m going to need lots, no, humoungously huge amount of dedication to make it happen, because I’m fighting against a formidable opponent here. This foe has gotten me smitten ever since I knew of it, and only because it has left me needing to perfect it’s art and study the science of it, and the fact that it’s an ever evolving foe amplifies it’s destructive abilities.
Tonight I’ll be facing it’s music. Tonight is time to let my foe know that TDLs are priorities.
When the clock strikes 11pm… Goodbye.. D… O.. T.. A!
by | Oct 8, 2009 | Uncategorized
And I’ve just made my million dollars. But this post isn’t about me, it’s about the unfathomable and almost always blameless Rafa Benitez.
Someone at work pointed out to me that there are great managers and then there are managers that blame others, and Rafa is one of those that finger points often. According to this guy, everytime Liverpool suffers a setback, he refuses to take the blame of perhaps using the wrong tactics or personnel, but rather choose to deflect the attention towards a pair of squabbling owners who don’t give him enough spare change to play with.
And that is exactly what Rafa has been doing eh? I don’t know. My guy at work points me to example like how Rafa wastefully and excessively purchase unproven youngsters, most prominently players like Lucas and Babel who’ve been warming the seats for too many games and staying cold on the pitch for just as many games.
And then he also points at how Rafa approaches a game and comments on the predominantly defensive tactics of the Liverpool manager, and the cautious approach that he brings to the team, which in turns leads to an over-reliance over burnt-out players like Torres and Gerrard.
Of course, naturally being a Reds fan, I oppose and counter his every allegations, but one allegation I failed to counter was why he brought in an injured player for nearly 20million? Alberto Aquilani has yet to even grace the substitute bench, and as excited as I am in watching what he brings to the team, I’m quite sceptic as to his abilities as well.
First off, he’s Italian, and Italians are never known for their creativity nor flair. They’re naturally good at headers or getting a headbuttm especially from certain Frenchmen.
Second off, he’s young. 22years of football experience, unproven at the world stage and Rafa gambles on this prodigy as a replacement for Alonso.
Thirdly, why didn’t he spend that amount on David Silva or David Villa!?!?!?
These are probably reasons as to why that guy at work thinks Rafa is a douchebag, which is against my sentiments, but he does carry some vital points in his arguements.
So this season’s Championship may appear to be slowly and painfully escaping Liverpool’s grasps, but I hope I don’t have to wait 53,000 years to see Liverpool lift their 19th Championship title, ‘cos I’m still willing to wait till next year.
Heh, the ever so typical Liverpudlian eh? Full of patience… and loads of loyalty!
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by | Oct 7, 2009 | Uncategorized
.. but still a looooong way to go lar!
Okay lah, not quite there — not even remotely close to financial freedom but this is definitely something right? That $0.5696 SGD is mine! All mine! My precious! Lol.
I know it’s a meagre and measly amount but that’s because I’ve yet to invite more people to join my team and start earning bigger amounts!
Someone I knew, whom I invited earlier, asked if this is even for real, as in can one even earn money from reading emails? Wait, can I answer that question directly? So, yes. Yes, one CAN earn money just by reading emails, and I’ve earned $0.5696 SGD!!!
Jokes aside, and I’m sure it’s quite a joke to be earning that amount, but does anyone see the bigger picture here?
I mean, like hello? Does anyone else see the power of leveraging and replication here? Honestly, to even shun such an opportunity can be likened to a Malay saying ‘Reski jangan dibuang, musuh jangan dicari’, which translates loosely to ‘Don’t throw away opportunities, and go looking for enemies’.
How hard can it be to open your email in the morning, and read it? Okay, let me rephrase this: how difficult can it be to open your email, click on a link (which will open a new webpage) and then leave it by itself for 30 seconds, cos that’s the timing required for you to earn your 1 credit. YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE TO READ IT! Get my drift here? Simply open, click, go elsewhere, and after 30s, close window.
Now how many times can you replicate this daily? Now how many friends can you leverage this upon?
Okay, okay, maybe some of us are quite well to do so we don’t do all these ‘trivial’ and ‘small’ things, but to say such things is merely to throw away the power of leveraging and shun this FREE opportunity.
Okay lah, maybe not free, cos you’re trading 30s of your time anyway, but that’s as much as it goes.
Ahaha, so if this statistics is anything to go by, I’ll be earning my Million dollar in… about 53,000 years later!
by | Oct 5, 2009 | Uncategorized
It was as if he knew what was going on inside my head, when all of a sudden he gave me a congratulatory/reassuring hug and at the same time stressing how important I am to the company. Knowing J as he is, I know that he’s the ‘commando’ worker who will do anything to get things done. I don’t doubt his sincerity, but at the same time this showcase is barely scratching the surface.
Lately I’ve been, as put by Bangau, jaded at work. Wll I guess it’s true. It has become… work these days. Don’t get me wrong, I love to work but there’s a different air about it for the past months and it’s an air that I’ve struggled to get away from, especially from my earlier company. When this new company started out, it wasn’t work.. it was… a labour of love. Indeed it’s true that people change intentions when it comes to ka-ching-ching!
Yes, the company we began is now very profitable and, may I say it, successful too. For almost a year I’ve taken a backseat, letting the chief boss and J run things around. 2 years ago, J barely had the confidence to meet a client and now I guess it’s the other way round. He’s improved tremendously and I think big boss notices it and even though I don’t get any credit for it, I’m happy for J. He does thank me in private for everything that I’ve taught him, and he realises how vital my presence is, but unfortunately big boss doesn’t see the backend work and regular inputs that I’ve done, and am still doing.
Granted big boss spends most of the time liaising with our clients and tending to production, and not knowing anything about computer stuffs or sales and customer support, which I silently spearhead, his judgement is prone to be biased. When the 3 of us first started out, there were weight in my opinions but not anymore. I get the feeling that him, being the sole director of the company, wishes it to stay that way – but I’ll still remember the day he roped me into the partnership. Dear Internet, at this time please note how important black and white is. Never underestimate it’s value in business. Like NEVER.
Anyway, I’m not so hard done by the fact that I’m not getting any director fees or any recognisable titles, cos I don’t really care about these much. But what I do care for is if my baby, my labour of love is being directed in a way which, simply put, isn’t going the way as we planned it in it’s infancy and I do not have the means of changing anything. In fact, the frust that builds up within me is a consequence of company directions that got decided by big boss and J, but without me. In fact, J regular consults with me before he discusses with big boss, but that’s as far as how much my involvement in company directions has evolved, or dissolved into.
Imagine you’re a baker and someone asked you to bake a cake, and not just a cake but your very special cake, and the first time you did it, you chose the ingredients together, and then somehow over time, you’re no longer within the ingredients buying/deciding stage. Fluctuations in raw materials cost have caused a lot of purchasing differences. You simply bake, and when that happens, do you still need to stay as a baker? Sure, you’ll know which ingredients work, and might silently change it if the wrong ones are given, but for how long can you work that way? How long?
So why is this a big concern for me? Simply because I cannot bring my design/sales team to cope with the workload that I foresee coming with the manpower/resources that I have at hand. Big boss and J don’t feel the strain that I do because they’re busy with production and support. In fact, the workload’s been super crazy for the past month and yet our reaction time has been really slow.
Which comes back to why did the younger J gave me a hug. You see, a heated debate with an old client’s new art director led to J to give me a hug, mentioning at the same time how important it is that I continue staying here. J understands my situation and when he sees me, probably for the first time ever that I’m ‘breaking’, in that debate with the new art director, he shared with me his thoughts.
Actually both these men are good men. They may not be a computer genius or speak fluent English but they are good hardworking people. I respect them and that’s why I joined the partnership 2 years ago. They’ve not lost my respect still and they’ve not hindered my work processes in any way but its just the niggling management part that’s biting pieces of me away. Like a river grinding away at a meander, something inside me is begging me incessantly.
Fact: I love running a business. I’m hooked on it. Working sucks. Big time.
An oxbow lake is forming. This meandering can’t go on forever. I gave myself 3 months to make a decision.
And that was 1 month ago.
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by | Oct 5, 2009 | Uncategorized
It may seem like a coincidence but does Liverpool’s performance has a relation with my bike situation?
Last mid-week, when Liverpool faltered 2-0 to Fiorentina in the UEFA Champions League, my bike failed to start rendering me bikeless, just as I wanted to return back to work from buying lunch in town, which I then took the cab back to office and barely paying for the fare with just a $5 note in my pocket — the fare was $4.80! Had the fare exceeded my pocket money, I’d have to ask the taxi to reverse then!
Anyway, my bike’s all fine now, despite dying and stuttering back then. I think fine is an understatement. It is ROARING again! Riding in the misty after-rain conditions earlier was simply superb, and I was on my way back from a client’s wedding to watch Liverpool’s game on tele, while I still can. (Singtel’s hijacked the EPL from SCV next year loh! Sobs. No more soccer on the big screen in the living room!)
Liverpool fared pretty decently well in the first half. Mascherano was back to his sniping ways while Gerrard was impeccable as usual. Unfortunately, Torres found the close attention of Chelsea’s defence too, um, close to his liking and was a restricted man throughout the 45 minutes. My thoughts, wow, Liverpool doing really great today! (My bike great, liverpool great, wow, a correlation!) I was pretty confident that Liverpool was going to come out all with all guns blazing in the second half.
Then Chelsea hit us with a sucker punch with the ever-so powerful Drogba crossing for Anelka to open the scoring. My thoughts, wow, Liverpool went behind but its okay, just a minor blip like what my bike experienced mid-week, and I was DARN confident that a late surge will see Liverpool bring home all 3 points.
Peppering the Chelsea end with long shots, mostly off-target, Liverpool looked like they were going to get the equaliser soon, but then Malouda had other ideas, ideas which didn’t quite agree with me, but I had to take it all in like a man. Again, Drogba powered his way into the penalty box before laying the ball into Malouda’s path for the game-and-set goal.
Chelsea 2 – Liverpool 0. It all seems so disappointingly familiar. Bah.
Hais. I guess there’s no relation between Liverpool’s performance and my bike’s situation after all. Maybe it’s my dota situation instead?
by | Oct 4, 2009 | Uncategorized
Ever felt that when you know you’ve got to do something but you’re holding back because for fear of failure? Well then, have you ever heard of the phrase ‘luck favours the bold’?
This is so especially true as shown in this early morning’s game between Manchester United and Sunderland. Trailing 2 goals to 1, Ferguson’s men threw caution to the wind and sieged Sunderland’s penalty box as if it was Apocalypse tomorrow. Too bad the Black Cats, the nickname for Sunderlandiansm or wahtever you call them, crumbled under the pressure with an unlucky own goal.
Yes, I’d say that it was an unlucky own goal, but I wouldn’t say that Manchester United was lucky. They created THAT own-goal. Would they have achieved it if half their players were half as motivated to play half as determined? Now that’s too many halves but I’m a firm believer that you make your own luck.
Like, why sit around all night long in a cyber cafe playing online games with people you barely know and then get hyper frustrated over a loss, if any? No, you’re not going to seal that $1000 direct sales deal by sitting in front of the monitor playing games. No, you’re not going to gain insight on how to close a sales, by wasting your time away like that.
Wow. Did I just hypothetically deduce how wasteful I’ve become, albeit indirectly and after giving a short discussion about Manchester United’s insanely obscene amount of luck that goes their way. Think about that 96th minute winner against Man City when they were given only 4 mins to understand why I pick on them specifically. And it’s not just because I’m a Liverpudlian. Okay, maybe it’s because I’m a Liverpudlian and my Dad’s a United fan. But Dad, I’ve nothing against you, in case you inexplicably reach upon these pages and are reading this. Love ya, but I ain’t got enough to sponsor your car insurance. Heh.
Anyway, yes, Manchester United may be claimed as lucky by some quarters, but boy do they work hard in achieving their results.
So final outcome of the game? Manchester United 2 – Luckless Black Cats (Sunderland) 2.
Wait a minute, maybe some people may argue that the Black Cats were lucky to score twice with the only 2 shots on goal that they had? Ahhhh, now that’s another story to tel…
by | Sep 30, 2009 | Uncategorized
Lobe: noun lowb
1. (anatomy) a somewhat rounded subdivision of a bodily organ or part.
2. (botany) a part into which a leaf is divided
3. The enhanced response of an antenna in a given direction as indicated by a loop in its radiation pattern
4. A rounded projection that is part of a larger structure
I highlighted it in red just so that I can lull myself into believing that there’s bigger things coming. Is there?
Interestingly, I had a banter with Bangau last night about what a business should be.
Before I get to that part, let me bring the debate a little earlier where I mentioned casually of how certain stuffs can be monetised in a certain way (I can’t recall what it was so let’s call it as ‘certain’ here..) and immediately Bangau quipped that I’m starting to view everything as a business opportunity. Quipping back, I pointed out that that’s only because I see a certain value in a certain item and that this value is potentially harvestable (monetize-able) which could bring about even more value! Now that’s business value!
Of course, Bangau commented that a business should be about profiting the community overall. Something that would benefit socially instead of just for pure monetary gains, and I’m all agreement with this point as well.
Wait, did I mention that before this banter we had an earlier conversation of the methods our prophets used to spread the religion and how the community back then wheeled and dealed. Naturally, Bangau was in a ‘conscientious mind’ whereby what the business receives, it’s given back in some way or another. Profit, or whatever there is left, should be used only to increase the potential/ability of the business.
Now again, I’m mentioning all this off of my head, and not based on some teachings or education which I’ve received ( or never received?) so I do not endorse nor ensure there’s any accuracy, if any, in this post. I’m just a regular guy, doggedly working day by day, by day, by day.. You know~
So who’s right here? Me or Bangau? In fact, I believe, that there shouldn’t be any right or wrong because it all depends on whose perspective you choose to view a business from. Me, I’m only viewing the banter subject from an economist point of view while Bangau chose to see it as a socialist, but we’re still cool. We’re gamers, so everything is debatable.
Anyway, back to this post’s introduction: lobe. ‘A rounded projection…’. My current mish-mash of opportunities and problems? ‘…that is part of a larger structure.‘ My future, or what’s left of it? I’m not sure if it’s really even large but… I do sense opportunities coming, but at the same time also that the road I’m on seems to be constricting even more. It’s getting tougher, but tell me, what isn’t?
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